That conversation stayed with me long after he drove away.
Last Friday, I got a call from the gas company.
"M'aam, I think you may have a gas leak. I am at your house now. Do you have any animals in the backyard?" he asked. His voice sounded courteous and kind.
"Yes, and I am about 7 minutes away from home. Can you wait until I get there?"
"Yes, m'am."
The leak was equivalent to having 72 pilot lights on at the same time. He checked the pipeline from the meter directly to the house. No leak. Yet the meter continued running like crazy.
"We always smell gas back along the fence," I insisted as my husband did before with the last gas man that came out to take a look.
"Well, it shouldn't be a horizontal pipe back there away from the house," he said, matter-of-factly. "Let me go back and check."
"Well, I do smell gas back here. Let me shut off the line again and see if I still smell it." "Hmm, well I don't smell it when the line is off. So, I guess you're right. Do you know why someone would run a gas line back here?"
"You said the meter was old, from 1980?" I asked.
"Yes," he said.
"Well, in 1980 there was a mother-in-law suite added on to the back of the house. In the den area of that addition is a gas fireplace. I think that's our culprit." I confirmed.
He was miraculously able to find the buried pipe extension and the valve to shut off the additional pipe line, saving me a $3000 plumber bill.
"Well, you and your husband can go get a steak dinner with the extra money you'll be saving every month," he said jokingly.
This got me thinking. What happens when I have an energy leak in my body? How will I know when it's a problem? What is draining me? How can I fix it?
For me, grief is adding a real weight that I carry into my daily living. My dad passed last October and I am still very much mourning the relationship I had with my father. Here are some symptoms that grief is causing me — and the herbs I turn to for relief:
1) Poor Sleep. My body is not able to repair and reset overnight. This leaves me running on an empty tank. Fortunately, I turn to chamomile, lavender, passionflower and valerian root. Chamomile helps ease my anxiety along with tension in my shoulders. Just the scent of lavender sends a message to my brain that despite my mental anguish — I am in fact — safe from harm and able to close my eyes. Passionflower and Valerian both play on the GABA (gamma-aminobutyric acid, a brain chemical that calms nerve activity). And for me, the double punch of valerian and passionflower is lights out sleep for me. By the way, valerian root is funky. It quite literally smells like funky ass. But, it is by far, the most effective. Browse our sleep support herbal blends crafted with chamomile, lavender, and valerian root →
2) Chronic Stress: Have you ever had a pet with severe separation anxiety? This first year without dad has felt like I'm a puppy looking out the window waiting for his truck to pull up. Gosh, I am so freaking SAD. DADDDDDD! This creates real stress in my body that has to be resolved. I usually take meditative baths where I listen to a guided meditation while soaking the toxins out of my body with a mix of chamomile and yarrow powder along with epsom salt and my tears. The grief monster eats me up sometimes. But these rituals — these small, intentional moments of self-care — help me find my way back.
3) Depleted Vitality: Grief is exhausting in ways that sleep alone can't fix. This is where adaptogenic herbs like ashwagandha and holy basil (tulsi) have become allies in my healing. Ashwagandha helps regulate cortisol — the stress hormone that runs rampant when we're grieving — while holy basil supports emotional resilience and mental clarity. Together, they help me show up for my days even when my heart feels heavy.
If you are reading this, I love you. Tend the temple. Heal from within.
Explore our herbal blends crafted for rest, calm, and renewal →
- Kandis
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